speek

"As a mum with a child that has always been autistic but only recognised to others as autistic since her diagnosis in November 2022, it has been hard to gain any access to support. Not through lack of trying. When the lack of support and information around self harm when I first discovered my child was SH was apparent to see, I went on a journey of research. I found many forms of conflicting advice and it was just as conflicting in my own brain when my child had hit crisis point. It felt out of control and I wasn’t sure if my response was appropriate and was so worried that I’d responding in a way that wasn’t helpful to my child. I wasn’t a mental health professional and our family was already in a traumatised state after the suicide of my daughter in 2020 which we just didn’t see coming. It has been a devastating loss and we all miss her immeasurably. We were hyper-vigilant with our other 2 children and as my daughter struggled to process the loss of her sister at such a young age it was heartbreaking.  One day I was just catching up on Instagram and SPEEK popped up as an advertisement. I normally scroll past advertisements but it grabbed my attention. I clicked on the link and read through it and signed up. I was contacted by a member of the team via phone call and she gave me in depth information about the course for parents. I knew I needed this it sounded exactly what I needed as a parent to learn and navigate through it.  Attending each session via zoom was helpful to me in terms of practicality because I just needed a quiet room at home and I didn’t have to seek out child care. I was a bit apprehensive at first and not always able to complete the homework still suffering grief brain I’m quite forgetful but within the sessions I completed the activities and engaged in the conversations. Towards the end I was mindfully completing the homework activities and since completing the course, the biggest thing I’ve taken away is the importance of looking after yourself as a parent during these difficult times. It gave me the skills to validate my child’s feelings and the skills to communicate with my child in a way she wouldn’t shut down. She has communication issues (one reason why the lack of statutory support was unavailable to us) due to ASD anyway but it has definitely helped me to explore those ways and put the work in.  I’m certainly responding to those difficult times with my child much better which in turn is helping her and that is exactly what I needed. I’m really appreciative to have been given this opportunity to attend these sessions. I’ve not found anything else like it and a safe place to have the difficult conversations that no one seems to want to have."